To the Girl Searching for the Perfect Relationship…

To the Girl Searching for the Perfect Relationship,

It’s not out there.

Yes, you heard me correctly.

The perfect relationship does not exist… and will never exist here on this earth.

I know what some of you are thinking. Those that know me personally know that I brag on my boyfriend constantly. He is a wonderful man of God who treats me with the utmost kindness and respect. He speaks my love languages every day, and he always makes sure that I feel treasured and cherished. I am forever thankful for those people in his life who have invested in him to help him become the Godly man that he is today.

But he’s not perfect.

Neither am I.

Which means that our relationship is not perfect (although I would say it’s darn near close!)

If I think about other relationships in my life (i.e. my parents, my sibling, my friends), those are not perfect either. I’ve made my share of mistakes and had to ask forgiveness more times than I can count. I say things that are careless and hurtful. Sometimes, my actions are offensive.

But they’re not perfect.

Neither am I.  

The Bible says, in Ecclesiastes 7:20,

“Indeed, there is not a righteous man on earth who continually does good and who never sins.”

And again, in Romans 3:23,

“For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.”

So, if imperfection riddles every relationship that we have, what’s the point? Why should we try?

I asked myself these questions this summer… a summer full of spiritual renewal and rejuvenation. Up to this point, God had already taught me a couple of things. First, He overwhelmed me with the fact that He wants a relationship with me (which you can read more about in another blog post by clicking here). Second, He reminded me that I am worthy because He says I am worthy. I am royalty because I am His, a daughter of the King! (To read more about what He spoke to me on that topic, click here.)

At this point in my summer road trip, in a small town in Michigan, God showed me that love is a choice. Forgiveness is a choice. Relationships are a choice.

According to Google, “choice” means “the opportunity or power to choose between two or more possibilities.”

 So, when I’m faced with any person in my life with whom I have a relationship, I am constantly faced with an opportunity and the power to choose.

I can choose to speak life… even if they’re not.

I can choose to uplift and encourage… even if they’re not.

I can choose to speak their love language…even if they don’t speak mine.

I can choose to serve them… even if they don’t serve me.

There’s beauty in these words: I can choose.

Jesus chose us.

Many years ago, He chose to leave heaven, leave His throne, and set aside His glory for a short time. He chose to come as a baby, contrary to what human minds would expect. He is perfect and sinless, yet He chose to take on our sin and die the death that was meant for me… and the death that was meant for you… the death that was meant for us. He chose to defeat sin and death so that we might have the choice of eternal life.

“For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

John 3:16

In regard to Jesus and salvation, we have to choose. We either choose to accept Him or not.

 In regard to relationships and those in our lives, we have to choose. We either choose to have good days or have bad days… irrespective of what happens within those days.

So, while we will never achieve that perfect relationship with a significant other or with anyone else for that matter, we can CHOOSE every single day to do and say things that will bring us as close as possible to that perfection.

So, let’s take that opportunity. Let’s make that choice. Let’s achieve the “as close to perfect as we can get” kind of relationship. The perfect relationship doesn’t exist, but the perfect opportunity, the perfect choice, the perfect effort does exist.

We have the opportunity. Let’s make the choice.

Much love,


**Dedicated to Mitchell, who has taught me more about love in the past few months than I’ve learned my whole life. Thanks for being as close to perfect as we can get here on earth, and cheers to many more “perfect days”! Day 27!**

3 Comments Add yours

  1. Carolyn Walsh says:

    Congratulations on your upcoming wedding! You both did the right thing – praying for a God-honoring spouse. May God continue to honor the two of you with His never-ending love. Blessings on all of you!

    Liked by 1 person

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